Monday, May 19, 2008

Johnny Depp can walk my plank


Mike Gier's Tiki band "Tongo Hiti" did a pirate themed show at Trader Vic's this weekend and he asked me to do some comedy bits throughout the show. I would randomly approach the band and scream "Permission to board the show sir!" I was Salty Dick the pirate.

For my first bit I walked up on stage and talked about an old sea shanty that we pirates had been singing for years. I said nobody knew where it originated from, but it always lifted our spirits after months at sea. Then I sang the Spongebob Squarepants theme song.

I was way to busy this week to write anything to extensive for the show. I did write one joke I'm really proud of:

"People always ask me what happen to my parrot. I tell them i had to get rid of it because it's pecker kept getting stuck in my ear.... I could always hear him coming."

Gold! Comedy gold.

I e-mailed Ricki Derek and Paul the Amazing and told them to send me a couple of the "Crusty Seaman" stories. I got two of them and edited them down. They both went over great.

The band was running behind in the show and Mike said he had to cut the last story. I was sad because it was really funny. The comedy fates were with me however, when the guitar player blew a fuse. I jumped on stage and read the story while he changed his fuse. I
I kept putting my spy glass up to my eye patch and saying I couldn't see a damn thing. There were steering wheels nailed to the wall throughout the restaurant and I kept grabbing them and announcing I was going to steer the restaurant into calmer waters.

I love these gigs because I get to walk around in character and screw with people. I'm still a bit timid but I'm getting better at it with each gig.

Chips Ahoy!

1 comment:

sam said...

AARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Shiver me timbers, matey! Than sounds like a jolly good time at sea.