Happy July 4th! I just shot off some fireworks in my toilet, if you know what I mean.
Speaking of the toilet, I wanted to tell you guys about two commercials I saw back-to-back last night. Now I'm pretty sure that some one somewhere has the job of selecting the order of the commercials. It's not some enormous top-secret super commercial selecting computer in the basement of a government building. So seeing these two ads back to back made me wonder if there was a guy somewhere laughing his ass off. The first commercial in this tag team of awesome was an ad for Adult Diapers. Now that is sad and funny on it's own, but then they followed that ad up with an ad for laxatives. Not just any laxatives, but laxatives you take before you go to bed. That's like showing a condom commercial then showing an early pregnancy test commercial.
I thought it was pretty amazing that the planets aligned just right to have me in front of the TV at the precise time that magic moment happened. I mean the odds are astronomical that I would have seen such an ostentatious event. Fate and demeanor dictate that by all rights I should have changed the channel once the adult diaper commercial started, but for some reason I sat there and weathered the ad only to be treated to a laxative commercial. It was awe-inspiring. I would have needed an adult diaper if the next commercial was an ad for toilet cleanser or a commercial for Taco Bell.
There are those who do not believe in miracles, and to them I say neigh. Low I hath witnessed a miracle, and it was glorious.