Monday, June 2, 2008

I'm dying, again

If you didn't know already, I'm a bit of a hypochondriac. I'm sort of in the middle, enough to over react to anything that happens to my body, but not crazy enough to be on zany pills.

On my "I'm gonna die from this I know it" list this month.

1. Crazy bug bit on the back of my elbow. That's the inside bendy part. This scares me because it isn't like a regular bug bite(I'm assuming), and it's taking way to long (in my mind) to go away.

2. Pain in my lower left side gut area. Just started out of no where two days ago. Doesn't hurt if I'm not doing anything, but does if I move in weird ways. And I do that a lot. This sucks because it's under my new an improved fat belly, so when I press on the area that hurts to make sure it still hurts, I'm reminded of how fat I have gotten lately, which depresses me even more.

3. Tooth still tender. I'm convinced that something weird is going on in my mout that will spread to my brain.

That's all for this month, but we're only 2 days in, there's plenty of time to diagnose myself with many other deadly imaginary afflictions.

Me and the wife are fighting to tooth and nail against having to turn on our air conditioner. We've opened every window and, at last count, we have 3 fans pointed at our bed. I crawled into bed last night and realized I was in the middle of the perfect conditions for a tornado to form.

We don't want to turn on the air in order to save a few bucks on our electricity bill, but the pools of sweat forming around us whenever we stop moving for more than a minute are becoming to much. I think I might have to bite the freon bullet tonight.

3 comments:

dicky said...

I'm a month into the cool refreshing A/C God has given us. Sweet Jesus A/C is wonderful. Thank you Thank you. Amen

sam said...

the only sickness you have is in your head, wacko.

i too enjoy a/c on a regular basis staying nice and cool... aaahhh.

Nick Gibbons said...

We turned it on last night and it was divine! Fuck you environment!