Poor Little Britney

I just watched Britney Spears "perform" on Good Morning America. Poor Britney. I feel really bad for her. She's had a really rough life. I'm not even talking about her sham of a marriage, her mental breakdown, her pregnant teenage sister, or her bad fashion choices. I'm just sad that some one born with absolutely no talent is being forced time and time again to perform and put out albums. It's like pushing your kid out on a stage and saying he can speak Japanese, when he doesn't know a word of Japanese and just wants to play with his Legos.

The "performance" was of her managers and producers new single Womanizer. One thing I learned today watching Britney "perform" was that if you hire enough back up dancers, you don't have to dance at all. I really think a mannequin on wheels with strings tied to it's arms that someone above it could control, would've moved more than she did on stage.

My brain might have been tainted a little because 3 seconds before I clicked over to endure Britney, I watched Beyoncé's new video for the song All the Single Ladies. It was too much, one extreme to the other. It was like watching Michael Angelo create David then watching the elephant that paints. The Beyoncé video is freaking hypnotic. I defy you to look away. It's a bit unnecessarily over the top though, and I would like to say to Beyoncé, "Girl (Nick's head pivots back on forth on neck) slow down, you workin' way to hard. We got you, we like you, you ain't gots to hurt yourself. Slow that caboose up baby."

I gotta go poo.