Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Blown Off Finger Clean-Up on Ilse 16

Upon entering the supermarket yesterday, my eyes befell a display propped up in front of the main entrance. I rubbed my eyes in disbelief then promptly cheesed my jeans when what I thought was a mirage, turned out to be reality. Right between the greetings cards and the about to go bad, or as the store says "on sale", cantaloupe was a huge box of various fireworks. And not those pussy ass sparklers neither, we talking fully loaded, dangerous, gun powder filled, skin burning, eye loosing, fireworks.

As a red blooded American male, I love blowin' me up some shit. I've been buying fireworks and destroying small toys ever since I was a littler guy. My fondest memories of childhood are visiting my cousin Lance out in east Texas. He lived in a very rural little town called Henderson. Every summer we would go to the little fireworks stand, buy as much as we could afford, and get to esplodin' stuff.

I'm amazed that I still have all my fingers and both eyes. In Texas it's illegal to sell, buy, or explode fireworks in the city limits. When I saw that you could not only buy them in the city limits, but at a freaking chain grocery store, I flipped out. I haven't checked into it, but I'm lead to believe that you can also fire them off in the city limits as well. To me this sounds absolutely retarded. Atlanta's nothing but trees. The city's one burning ember away from fiery destruction. And we're in a freaking drought. How can it be legal to sell and esplode fireworks?

Bottom line, who cares! If you want to see some shit get blown the fuck up, come by my house on the fourth.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Oh Niles

I've wanted to do this bit in some form or fashion for a long time, but it would take several trial and error live performances to get the timing down. I'm way to lazy for that, so I decided to put it together in a short video piece.

I'm not sure if it's perfect yet, but you have to walk before you can fly.

Hope everyone is having a great holiday weekend!

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Open Letter To Anonymous

Dear Anonymous Comment Poster,

Thank you. Thank you for having the courage to post anonymous comments on my blog. Thank you for taking the time out of your undoubtedly busy day to post a backhanded and or caddy anonymous comment. It must be difficult for someone with your stature and importance to sift through the internet finding blogs of insignificant people. Your hours of research, I must implore, are not in vein.

It's a service that we, as humans, are very thankful. We need a person to scour the intretnets, helping knock people who may have a haughty attitude, down a couple of pegs. I mean, who are we to think we can just post details about ourselves for our friends and relatives to read and not think that someone else may take umbrage with our devil may care attitude.

I applaud your audacious bravery. What a chore it must be to lift your anonymous fingers up and down on a keyboard, constructing anonymous sentence after anonymous sentence of humbling sentiments.

Thank you "anonymous". Thank you for putting this nobody in his place. What was I thinking? I mean really.

Sincerely,
Peon Nick Gibbons

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

How I Got A Job

I'd like to talk about making that video, which was a ton of fun as well as an ass load of work. A friend of mine that works at Comedy Central, and had worked with Radical Axis on the animated show "Freak Show", told me I had to hook up with these guys. He contacted Radical Axis and told them about me. A month after settling in Atlanta I e-mailed them and set up a meet and great. I traveled up to the Radical Axis magic factory at 11 am on Tuesday February 12th. I met, my now good friend and boss, Craig at the door. He led me into a small office. The Radical Axis rulers Craig, Scott and Todd watched a couple of my films that I brought on a DVD. They liked them a lot. Next they gave me a tour of the place.

You could have knocked me over with a feather that day. I'm a huge Aqua Teen fan, and I was just in shock that I was standing in the building where it was made and talking to the people who made it. After the tour they said there really wasn't any work there right then, but they would keep me in mind if anything came up.

They weren't lying, because that Friday, a mere three days after meeting them, they called me on speaker phone with Matt Freaking Maiellaro, one of the creators of Aqua Teen. Inside I was flipping out, but I tried not to sound like an idiot on the phone. They asked me if I could animated a music video in a month. I said I could, not knowing if that was true or not. We set up a meeting for the following Monday.

I downloaded the song that night and started working on a little animatic to show the guys. I animate using Final Cut Pro, which is retarded and takes much longer than it should, but it works for me. My in laws were in town that weekend, so I had to juggle them and work on the piece. Every second I had free I tinkered on the animatic. I was nervous about the meeting and I wanted to have something to show the guys.

Monday rolled around and I went into the meeting with the below test as a quicktime burned onto a CD. Matt was there. All the guys loved the test. They didn't expect me to do anything. Matt immediately took the CD, pulled the test onto his computer, and e-mailed it to the band. They dug it and it was on. You've seen the video that I worked on 10 hours a day 6 days a week for a month, now witness the 25 second test that got me the job.


video

I just wanted to say thanks to Matt and Radical for believing that I could do it, and for giving me all the support along the way. I'd also like to thank the academy and my loving wife. Mom... Dad..... without you guys.... I have to go, there's something in my eye....

Monday, May 19, 2008

Adult Swim Website

My video is on the front page of the Adult Swim webpage! Way to go me! I actually had no hand in that, it was all Matt Maiellaro's pull that got that to happen. At any rate that means I can now embed it into my blog for you guys that were to lazy to follow the link a while back. Here it is:



Visit it on the actual page HERE and give it a 10. If you have a second.

I'll post the 5 second piece I did in order to get the gig tomorrow.

Enjoy.

Johnny Depp can walk my plank

RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Mike Gier's Tiki band "Tongo Hiti" did a pirate themed show at Trader Vic's this weekend and he asked me to do some comedy bits throughout the show. I would randomly approach the band and scream "Permission to board the show sir!" I was Salty Dick the pirate.

For my first bit I walked up on stage and talked about an old sea shanty that we pirates had been singing for years. I said nobody knew where it originated from, but it always lifted our spirits after months at sea. Then I sang the Spongebob Squarepants theme song.

I was way to busy this week to write anything to extensive for the show. I did write one joke I'm really proud of:

"People always ask me what happen to my parrot. I tell them i had to get rid of it because it's pecker kept getting stuck in my ear.... I could always hear him coming."

Gold! Comedy gold.

I e-mailed Ricki Derek and Paul the Amazing and told them to send me a couple of the "Crusty Seaman" stories. I got two of them and edited them down. They both went over great.

The band was running behind in the show and Mike said he had to cut the last story. I was sad because it was really funny. The comedy fates were with me however, when the guitar player blew a fuse. I jumped on stage and read the story while he changed his fuse. I
I kept putting my spy glass up to my eye patch and saying I couldn't see a damn thing. There were steering wheels nailed to the wall throughout the restaurant and I kept grabbing them and announcing I was going to steer the restaurant into calmer waters.

I love these gigs because I get to walk around in character and screw with people. I'm still a bit timid but I'm getting better at it with each gig.

Chips Ahoy!

Friday, May 16, 2008

Beard Deconstruction Week: Day 5

FRIDAY: The Chan

This one looks horrible. By far the nastiest facial hair formation to date. Score!

I've been playing GTA 4, pretty much everyday for the past two weeks. It's an amazing game. My video gaming history goes back over 25 years. From the time I was a little kid with the nickname "Gimme Gibbons" because I was always begging for quarters, until now when I just play after my wife goes to bed, coming to work with red eyes and sore thumbs. I'm a gamer through and through.

One thing has stayed consistent throughout my gaming career, and that's my penchant for getting way angrier at an inanimate object than anyone should. If I mess up or get killed I will throw a mini temper tantrum, complete with flailing arms and a myriad of profanity. Granted I have to whisper my string of cursing now because the wife is asleep, but the sentiment is still there. I've even thrown a controller a time or two.

And yet even after 25 odd years of game playing, the thought never occurred to me that I'm supposed to mess up. Last night I realized if I played perfectly through a game the first time, that it wouldn't be any fun. It wouldn't be rewarding to finish if I just sat there and robotically went through the motions without any problems. In essence, I shouldn't be frustrated when I screw up, I should celebrate, because that means I'm doing it right. I'm being challenged. Plus how retarded is it for a 35 year old man/boy to get pissed off at a video game?

I'll still get mad, it's that emotion that drives people to want to do better. I'll just know in the back of my head that the anger is a sign of the human need to be awesome.

CHANGING SUBJECT............NOW!

Tonight in L.A. at the Viper room, the band Year Long Disaster is having the premiere party for their new video. There will be special guests and it's going to be a lot of fun. Oops, they forgot to invite the guy that animated, storyboarded, and edited the entire video all by himself in less than a month working 9 hour days 6 days a week. Minor oversight I suppose. And that's all I'm going to say about that.

The video should be popping up all over the place after this weekend. I'll post a better link of it when it appears on you tube.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Beard Deconstruction Week: Day 3

WEDNESDAY: The Motorhead

I keep forgetting that I have crafted my facial foliage into a bizarre shape, so when people look at me strange it takes me a minute to figure out why they are looking. Is this what it feels like to be carrot top?

I think I'm playing a pirate in a show this weekend. I haven't been contacted by the people in charge of the show to help me with my costume yet. It's on a Saturday night and I think it's by the pool at the downtown Hilton that houses the Trader Vic's. I will basically just be walking around posing for pictures with people there. It ain't great but they pay me 100 bucks. That ain't great either, but these are hard times and every little bit helps.

RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Sorry the R button got stuck.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Beard Deconstruction Week: Day 2

TUESDAY: The Frasier

OK, so we're starting slow. You can practically here me saying "Oh Niles!"

I mailed something at the post office today and the lady working there told me that stamps have gone up a penny. She said people were complaining yesterday, so she told them it was a lot better than gas prices. I laughed and agreed, because I'm very awkward in social settings when having to deal with people I don't know surrounded by more people I don't know. Seriously, if you wanted me to agree to something I normally wouldn't, just get a pretty girl behind a Starbuck's counter to ask me. If a Target employee were to say to me, "I'm gonna need to see your ID and we'll need your soul to give to Satan as well." I'd probably be damned right now.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Beard Deconstruction Week

It's time for my beard to take a hike. Each day this week I plan on slowly removing my face fungus. I'll start by leaving it be for now.

MONDAY: The Drifter

I can tell all of you are on the edge of your seats. It's exciting isn't it? OK smart ass why don't you tell me about your exciting day?

My friend Sam told me he only likes reading my blog when I'm angry about something. OK Sam, get ready because this is your favorite version of me, Angry Nick.

I've noticed in this fare city of Atlanta, as the days get warmer, more and more people are driving with their windows down. I've also noticed that 1 in 3 of these drivers is blasting really shitty hip hop as loud as their little factory installed speakers will go. I'm not even talking about punk kids here, I'm talking full grown men and women. Seriously? You can't enjoy your music unless it's painful? I'm all for rocking out with my cocking out, but it's no fun being in a confined space, having a wall of semi distorted sound being shoved into your ears.

I'd like to tell all those idiots that no one thinks they're cool because they have mastered the ability to operate the volume on their car radio. Man has had the skill to turn knobs on simple machinery in the bag for thousands of years now, and it has since lost it's grandeur. I say I'd "like" to tell them, but their ears are probably ringing so bad they wouldn't hear me.

Another point I'd like to impart upon these musical marauders is that every person on the planet has their own personal taste in music. Sure there are several people that may like the same songs you do, but the odds of you pulling up to them at the exact time they are in the mood to hear the song you are cramming into their ears, are astronomical at best.

Here's my favorite part about these people. And trust me, they ALL do this. It's human nature to look in the direction of a loud noise. Loud noises have been proven scientifically to be the one thing that frightens everyone. So it's natural for a person to glance over at an area where loud music is playing. Now I've tested this, and no matter what look I have on my face, upset, frustrated, or even happy, the driver ALWAYS stares at me as if I'M doing something wrong. As if the fact that I heard their music and responded to it was a horrible social faux pa. How dare I acknowledge they are enjoying horrible music at insane decibels.

It's like the chic that wears a really tight low cut shirt. She obviously wants you to look at her boobs, but acts offended when you do. I hate that to.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY

This is just a blog for my mom, so if I didn't crawl out of your vagina, please ignore.

Happy Mothers Day!

I'm so thankful each day that I was blessed with such an amazing person to be my mother. You are always there for me, which is no easy task because I'm one needy, selfish little ball of neurotic fury. You continue to bend to my every request and help me with all my silly projects. I live in fear that one day you will wake up and realize that you are sick of putting up with me. That fear however, quickly dissipates when I remember how awesome you are and your love is unconditional.

Thanks for all you do for me and I hope someday I'll be able to share with a little person of my own the same love that you have so unselfishly shown me.

I love you mom.

Friday, May 9, 2008

Beard Update

We're three weeks into the beard:

Even though it looks like it in this picture, I'm not drunk. I'm not fat either... OK so maybe I'm fat.

I'm giving it one more week, then it's time to start shaving it into ridiculous formations.

As many of you know, I now live in Atlanta, or as I call it, Turner Network. A couple of weeks ago, my buddies Craig and Matt were able to slip a copy of the Aqua Rangers to the guys that run the website called "Super Deluxe". It's a website that features short comedy films. Super Deluxe is owned by Turner, and unlike a lot of other comedy themed sites, Super Deluxe will actually pay you for your work.

I was super excited because I just knew they would leap at the chance to buy 7 episodes of a funny show that's already finished and ready to go. I was crushed to find out that they didn't like it, or more specifically, didn't think it was a good "fit" for the site.

I'm not gonna lie, that really knocked the wind out of my sails for a while. I know Aqua Rangers isn't perfect by any stretch of the imagination.There are 100s of things I would like to change about it, but it's as good, if not better than most of the internet series' out there.

For a week or so I was really bummed. I never let disappointments like that hold me down for to long. The only way to succeed in this game is to keep moving forward, even when the treadmill's going the wrong direction.

This week it was announced that Super Deluxe was shutting it's cyber doors and was being folding into the Adult Swim website. I tend to think if I would have been able to get this into their hands a year ago things might have been different.

I kind of think that's the reason they "passed" on it more than them not liking it. At least that's what I'm telling my reflection from now on.

So I'll continue on my journey, not letting road blocks and pot holes derail my boat to planet success.

On a related note, they liked my story ideas for my pitch and are moving forward. Next they'll put together a pitch packet. I'm totally excited about that, because my buddy Todd will be doing character designs for the show. He's a very talented artist here at Radical who has worked on Aqua Teen, Squid Billies, and 12oz Mouse. He's awesome. Check my links to see his greatness.

Bad news was, they want me to change the title. Now I have to think of a new title. I've had this show idea for so long that it's difficult to think of it with a new title, but you gotta do what you gotta do.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Put this in your mouth

Found this in the store the other day. How dare they display such an obscene item? There were children in the store.

That's all i got today. Just thought all you jerks could use a little cock.

BTW, I'm holding a good recipe for beef stew in my left hand. We cooked it in the crock pot. If I would have bought this item I could have put cock in my crock. Screw Dr. Seuss, that shit ain't even hard at all.

Monday, May 5, 2008

A present for you, faithful blog reader

As stated in my last blog, I re cut all the episodes of the aqua rangers this weekend. I got them all down to 5 minutes. I also made them black and white and put an aged film filter on them. They look OK, but I think I might try putting this aged film/video filter on them that my buddy at work built in after effects.

They look great. I was able to improve a lot of the jokes and definitely help them to move at a faster clip. I was even able to add some jokes here and there. Case in point, the below offering. This is something I can't believe I didn't think of the first time around. The gags as low brow as they come, but I'll be damned if it didn't make me laugh out loud.

At any rate and without further ado, I submit to you the George Lucased up version of a scene from Aqua Rangers:

BE CAREFUL IF YOU'RE WEARING HEADPHONES, I THINK THIS CLIP RUNS A LITTLE HOT AUDIO WISE.

video
Please tell me what you think in my comments section, I crave your feedback. CRAVE IT!

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Blog Sunday

Saw Iron Man yesterday and loved it. I do have a man crush on Robert Downey anyway, so this was a no brainer. If you haven't seen it, go. Be sure to stay seated for all the credits, there's an extra scene at that end. It didn't make any sense to me, but I don't know nothin' 'bout no iron man comics.

I'm re-cutting the old Aqua Rangers episodes today. I'm waiting for a render right now so I figured I'd shit out a blog. I'm going to edit each of them down to under 5 minutes, take out the color, and put an old film grain effect on them.

I'm hoping the new length will help sell them. It will quicken the pace and make them more palletible to an ever growing attention deprived internet public.

Gotta go, love you guys.

Friday, May 2, 2008

Beard Contest 2008

Me and my boss Craig are having a beard contest. I generally only let my facial hair sprout for about a week before I hack up my face in an attempt to shave the prickly follicles.

When i met Craig 3 months ago he had an 10 inch beard. About two weeks ago he shaved it all off and i made the mistake of saying we should have a beard growing contest. I've not shaved in two weeks and here is what my face area looks like.


Craig always has a beard. That's his thing. The contest was lost for me before it began, but this was a good excuse to see what the hell my beard would look like if I let it take over my face for a while. My problem is my wife hates it. She says it's to scratchy and wiry. Now it has become a "Who can annoy their wife longest" contest.

I give me another week before my wife starts contacting lawyers to have divorce papers drafted up.